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如果我懂心理学...

心理学,可想而知是一门很玄的科目。基本上,只要你说“我读心理学”,大家的眼神就如闪起了闪光灯或身体向后退。这些都是我们心理学学生都会遇到的状况。每个人都是好奇宝宝,这是无可改变的事实。接下来的问候语就是“你知道我在想什么吗?” 我们就只能无奈,也无助。我们只能不断地重复地解释,并且坚定的说“不是”,不过得来的回应就是“不相信”。

你也许看到美丽的女孩,我或许看到的只是没有完整脸的男人

还没上心理学的时候,我与大家一样,并不了解什么是心理学?我以为是催眠,我也以为可以看穿别人,我更加认为心理学就是治疗与辅导。这些也许是心理学息息相关的课题,不过这并代表心理学。心理学,涵盖了许多的领域。商业,医疗,社工,学府等等,都需要心理学。不要认为你上过了心理成长的课程,就到处告诉别人你读了心理学。这只是更加抹黑了别人对心理学的误解。心理学是一生的课题,永远都学不完,读不尽。

我个人认为心理学,可以是一个沟通之道。它教导我们不要一味灌输自己的思想套在别人的身上。当你认为别人应该怎样做或怎样想的时候,是否应该停下来想一想,当你认为对的时候,别人也许认为是错的。我们应该去聆听别人的意见。如果你一直不断地否定别人,别人对你也只好回避三尺。更何况当你聆听别人的思想的时候,你会豁然发现,受益人其实就是你。你又多学了一些知识,你也赢了别人的肯定与认同。

鸟妈妈把虫儿给鸟宝宝吃?还是一个女人一半的脸呢?

我更加认为心理学让你增加情绪的素养。当你了解自己,或尝试了解别人的当儿,渐渐地你会发现情绪上的转折。我发觉当我越了解自己,了解别人的时候,我变得更有耐心,也不容易情绪激动。当你有安定的心情,才能有思考的能力。情绪的波动绝对会影响你对一个人的判断。有一句话,我一直都记得。虽然只是很普通的一句话,却让我无法忘记,那就是“如果你要辅导别人,你要懂得控制自己的情绪”。对,如果自己无法承担情绪,如何有能力去辅导别人呢?

如果真的要谈心理学,我甚至可以长篇大论。因为,永远讲不完。今天突然想写出自己对心理学的小小看法,是因为突然有感触。无数不同课派的心灵成长课程出现在这个社会上。你不难发现,大家其实对心灵课程产生了很多的兴趣。这些课程,我相信对自己个人成长绝对有作用。不过,我也害怕就是被滥用。成长,我个人的定义是接纳,了解,改变自己。如果你的成长就只是让自己接纳与了解,并少了改变,那就是还没有蜕变。我们总不能老是像一个小孩子一样,需要被呵护吧?所以,心灵成长不是让你上我了短期课程,你就完全成长了。所以,换言之,不要滥用你说学到的一切,特别是在别人的身上。

如果你愿意花一个小时去说教别人,那就会好像赌注一样,赢或输就只有一半的胜算。

但是,

如果你愿意花一分钟的时间去聆听别人,那就好像不用打的战,只有完全的胜算。


共勉之~


Hui Ru

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